BurgerBear (w/ Bear Ranger) and Dusto Bunny, where did they get these lame ass names from, the 3 for a buck bin at a dollar store? Couldn't pay me to go watch this shit.
11/18 KAIJU BIG BATTEL 'ONCE MORE UNTO THE BREACH' LIVE REPORT FROM SOMERVILLE, MA.
Kaiju Big Battel “ONCE More Unto The Breach”
11/18/2017 Somerville, MA
The band Psychic Dog is playing a pre-show set! Good high energy rock. Check them out on Twitter: @PsychicDog. Kaiju is streaming this show on Twitch!
Match 1: Poo Kaiju vs French Toast
This starts in between songs. It is quick. Poo hits a superkick and gets the pin in a minute. The band resumes playing.
Winner: Poo Kaiju
As we go through the official show introduction, a fighto spills into the ring from the back
Match 2: DW Cycloptopus III vs Slofang
After some back and forth including some slams and a cutter, Cycloptopus wraps a building around Slofang’s head and destroys it with a whirlwind punch for the pin.
Winner: DW Cycloptopus III
They announce that BurgerBear won the Kaiju Twitchcontinental title, defeating Dr. Cube posse member Hell Monkey. Dr. Cube is out with Grudyin to cut a promo on BurgerBear. He says he is here for his pound of medium rare grilled flesh. Cube dips Grudyin’s Horn in poison and demands BurgerBear come defend the title.
Match 3: BurgerBear (w/ Bear Ranger) vs Grudyin (w/ Dr. Cube) for The Twitchcontinental title
Brawling to start. Bear Ranger throws an onion ring to BurgerBear to use. Dr. Cube grabs the leg and B.B. gets hit instead. Grudyin is caught in the onion ring. Grudyin starts smashing buildings. B.B. gets powerbombed from the top. Grudyin is German suplexed. Bear Ranger hits a cross body. Grudyin goes to Stab BurgerBear with the poison horn but Bear Ranger takes the hit instead. Dr. Cube’s minions take Bear Ranger’s body away for experiments. In the confusion, Grudyin nails BurgerBear and gets the pin!
Winner & New Kaiju Twitchcontinental Champion: Grudyin
Match 4: Tikirilla vs Dusto Bunny (Hair vs Hare)
Tikirilla has a leg bone and uses it to beat and choke Dusto. The room reeks of baby powder smell now. Good gimmick, needs more ventilation. Dusto almost gets the pin off a side Russian leg sweep. Tikirilla thinks this is a HAIR match and insists on trying to tear the hair off of Dusto’s body. Bunny hulks up after a building shot to the head and gets a near fall off a stunner. Bunny hits a pedigree but misses a follow up elbow. Tikirilla almost chokes him out but Dusto rolls up him for the 3 count.
Winner: Dusto Bunny
(Intermission)
Match 5: Buzz & Feed (Merle Skeeter & Yarsminko) vs The Bodega Boys (Silver Potato & Kung Fu Chicken Noodle)
A rare Kaiju Tag battle! Silver Potato is on fire, dancing and nailing Skeeter with lots of high flying offense. Kung Fu tags in and the Bodega Boys are running wild. Potato hits a giant catapult Senton on Skeeter. Kung Fu can gets clocked, allowing Buzz & Feed to double team Potato with several shots. Kung Fu grabs a cell phone and orders some pizza. The pizza man arrives but the monsters steal the pizza and eat it. Kung Fu gets Potato out of there and fends off the monsters. They set up a pair of buildings and lay the remains of the pizza across it. The Bodega Boys fight back and 3D Skeeter through the pizza for the win!
Winners: The Bodega Boys (Silver Potato & King Fu Chicken Noodle)
Derano is out for an open challenge. Steam Powered Tentacle Boulder answers the call!
Match 6: Derano vs Steam Powered Tentacle Boulder
Boulder destroys Derano. He overpowers Derano, slamming his into, onto and with all the available buildings. Boulder gets the easy pin after a splash onto a building.
Winner: Steam Powered Tentacle Boulder
As they announce the main event, Dr. Cube hits the ring holding Bear Ranger’s Head. “Alas poor Bear Ranger, I killed her well!”. He calls out Pedro Plantain for a rematch for the Kaiju Grand Championship. Announcer Mario Bueno reminds him that someone wants revenge and introduces American Beetle, the Kaiju Cube originally beat for the belt. Cube is not happy. Mario Bueno says that Beetle will not be alone in the fighto. Kaiju Grand Champion, Pedro Plantain is here too! This is a 3-way!
Main Event: Dr. Cube vs American Beetle vs Pedro Plantain for the Kaiju Grand Championship
The bell rings and Dr. Cube immediately says he won’t touch his opponents and replaces himself with Super Minion 13.
NEW Main Event: Super Minion 13 vs American Beetle vs Pedro Plantain for the Kaiju Grand Championship
Beetle and Pedro try to fight off 13 but the Super Minion is too powerful for them. Dissension breaks out and we have a proper triple threat. Some big moves including a Monster Destroyer. Beetle wipes out Plantain and almost gets the pin. 13 ejects the ref before the 3 count, hits a double underhook piledriver on Beetle and steals he pin on Pedro. We have a new champion!
Winner and new Kaiju Grand Champion: Super Minion 13
After the match, Dr Cube demands his creation presents him with the championship but 13 shoves his down and walks away victorious. Dr. Cube ends the show in a dumbfounded fury!
11/18 KAIJU BIG BATTEL 'ONCE MORE UNTO THE BREACH' LIVE REPORT FROM SOMERVILLE, MA.
Kaiju Big Battel “ONCE More Unto The Breach”
11/18/2017 Somerville, MA
The band Psychic Dog is playing a pre-show set! Good high energy rock. Check them out on Twitter: @PsychicDog. Kaiju is streaming this show on Twitch!
Match 1: Poo Kaiju vs French Toast
This starts in between songs. It is quick. Poo hits a superkick and gets the pin in a minute. The band resumes playing.
Winner: Poo Kaiju
As we go through the official show introduction, a fighto spills into the ring from the back
Match 2: DW Cycloptopus III vs Slofang
After some back and forth including some slams and a cutter, Cycloptopus wraps a building around Slofang’s head and destroys it with a whirlwind punch for the pin.
Winner: DW Cycloptopus III
They announce that BurgerBear won the Kaiju Twitchcontinental title, defeating Dr. Cube posse member Hell Monkey. Dr. Cube is out with Grudyin to cut a promo on BurgerBear. He says he is here for his pound of medium rare grilled flesh. Cube dips Grudyin’s Horn in poison and demands BurgerBear come defend the title.
Match 3: BurgerBear (w/ Bear Ranger) vs Grudyin (w/ Dr. Cube) for The Twitchcontinental title
Brawling to start. Bear Ranger throws an onion ring to BurgerBear to use. Dr. Cube grabs the leg and B.B. gets hit instead. Grudyin is caught in the onion ring. Grudyin starts smashing buildings. B.B. gets powerbombed from the top. Grudyin is German suplexed. Bear Ranger hits a cross body. Grudyin goes to Stab BurgerBear with the poison horn but Bear Ranger takes the hit instead. Dr. Cube’s minions take Bear Ranger’s body away for experiments. In the confusion, Grudyin nails BurgerBear and gets the pin!
Winner & New Kaiju Twitchcontinental Champion: Grudyin
Match 4: Tikirilla vs Dusto Bunny (Hair vs Hare)
Tikirilla has a leg bone and uses it to beat and choke Dusto. The room reeks of baby powder smell now. Good gimmick, needs more ventilation. Dusto almost gets the pin off a side Russian leg sweep. Tikirilla thinks this is a HAIR match and insists on trying to tear the hair off of Dusto’s body. Bunny hulks up after a building shot to the head and gets a near fall off a stunner. Bunny hits a pedigree but misses a follow up elbow. Tikirilla almost chokes him out but Dusto rolls up him for the 3 count.
Winner: Dusto Bunny
(Intermission)
Match 5: Buzz & Feed (Merle Skeeter & Yarsminko) vs The Bodega Boys (Silver Potato & Kung Fu Chicken Noodle)
A rare Kaiju Tag battle! Silver Potato is on fire, dancing and nailing Skeeter with lots of high flying offense. Kung Fu tags in and the Bodega Boys are running wild. Potato hits a giant catapult Senton on Skeeter. Kung Fu can gets clocked, allowing Buzz & Feed to double team Potato with several shots. Kung Fu grabs a cell phone and orders some pizza. The pizza man arrives but the monsters steal the pizza and eat it. Kung Fu gets Potato out of there and fends off the monsters. They set up a pair of buildings and lay the remains of the pizza across it. The Bodega Boys fight back and 3D Skeeter through the pizza for the win!
Winners: The Bodega Boys (Silver Potato & King Fu Chicken Noodle)
Derano is out for an open challenge. Steam Powered Tentacle Boulder answers the call!
Match 6: Derano vs Steam Powered Tentacle Boulder
Boulder destroys Derano. He overpowers Derano, slamming his into, onto and with all the available buildings. Boulder gets the easy pin after a splash onto a building.
Winner: Steam Powered Tentacle Boulder
As they announce the main event, Dr. Cube hits the ring holding Bear Ranger’s Head. “Alas poor Bear Ranger, I killed her well!”. He calls out Pedro Plantain for a rematch for the Kaiju Grand Championship. Announcer Mario Bueno reminds him that someone wants revenge and introduces American Beetle, the Kaiju Cube originally beat for the belt. Cube is not happy. Mario Bueno says that Beetle will not be alone in the fighto. Kaiju Grand Champion, Pedro Plantain is here too! This is a 3-way!
Main Event: Dr. Cube vs American Beetle vs Pedro Plantain for the Kaiju Grand Championship
The bell rings and Dr. Cube immediately says he won’t touch his opponents and replaces himself with Super Minion 13.
NEW Main Event: Super Minion 13 vs American Beetle vs Pedro Plantain for the Kaiju Grand Championship
Beetle and Pedro try to fight off 13 but the Super Minion is too powerful for them. Dissension breaks out and we have a proper triple threat. Some big moves including a Monster Destroyer. Beetle wipes out Plantain and almost gets the pin. 13 ejects the ref before the 3 count, hits a double underhook piledriver on Beetle and steals he pin on Pedro. We have a new champion!
Winner and new Kaiju Grand Champion: Super Minion 13
After the match, Dr Cube demands his creation presents him with the championship but 13 shoves his down and walks away victorious. Dr. Cube ends the show in a dumbfounded fury!
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